Women are always saying that men need to be more in touch with their feelings. Generalizations are hurtful; especially when they're false. The truth is that many men are in touch with their feelings, it's just that sometimes some women view those moments when men are sharing as a sign of weakness.
I get it; it's scary for someone to show you who they really are, but if any of us, male or female, ever expect to make progress in the area of relationships, then we have to be open to whatever it is that others are sharing with us. Good, bad or indifferent, there is beauty in learning about the imperfections of another person and we must embrace them. The movie Thanks for Sharing (2012) is a great reminder of that life lesson for us all.
In the movie Thanks for Sharing (2012), Adam (Mark Ruffalo) is a recovering sex addict who meets and falls for a breast cancer survivor named Phoebe (Gwyneth Paltrow) in a chance meeting at a party. Although they immediately hit it off and Phoebe is upfront about surviving cancer and her hesitation about dating another addict, Adam decides to withhold the fact that he is a recovering sex addict for fear that their budding relationship will come to an abrupt end. However, what he eventually realizes is that not only was Phoebe turned off by sex addiction, but that he kept such a secret after she initiated an open an honest start to their relationship. While Phoebe had every right to be upset, what she also had to realize is that people open up when they are ready and usually not a moment sooner.
From the first scenes of the movie, we see that Adam is clearly struggling with something. When he finally arrives at his sex addiction meeting, we begin to learn more about how crippling sex addiction can be; especially when other members of the group begin to open up. For Adam it hasn't necessarily been easy to be five years sober, but then again he had learned to significantly limit his exposure to temptation, including the opposite sex. That is, until he meets Phoebe at a party and instantly there is an attraction, but not just physical. They actually make a real connection, which begins to frighten Adam...for obvious reasons. As things begin to progress, despite his best efforts to keep his sex addiction a secret, Phoebe learns the truth and breaks things off with Adam. Adam's worst nightmare had come true, Phoebe had rejected him after learning his truth. In the end, Adam and Phoebe were able to reconcile as friends, but not before Adam was forced to restart his sobriety again.
While this movie dealt with sex addiction, I think it's important to not get caught up in the semantics of the plot. On a grander scale, this movie is about showing people who you really are, warts and all. Doing so not only makes for a better foundation of all our relationships, romantic or platonic, but it also helps others to see our total beauty as a person. There is beauty in all of us, including our imperfections. So, go forth and share your imperfect beauty!